Chick Flick Moments.

Let me start this blog post with a disclaimer: I love chick flicks just as much as the next girl. I love girls night & curling up on the couch snuggled in with blankets and pillows to spend the next hour and a halfish watching someone else's relationships work out better than you and your friends currently are.I love the things that accompany chick flick nights (normally): good friends, single jokes, and the looks that cross faces for a split second when the credits start rolling that says 'man, I hope that's me one day.'

That beings said...chick flicks make me laugh. For a VARIETY of reasons.

The whole reason that they're such a hit is because someone, somewhere discovered the formula to make all women, everywhere return to the theater over & over again, and sometimes drag their brothers, boyfriends, and fathers along too. It's in every typical chick flick. Ever.

Boy meets girl. In this first meeting you have a variety of options, but typically it goes one of two ways: either they hit it off immediately and fall madly for each other, or they tick each other off to no end and swear they'll never see each other again, EVER. What happens? They realize they have mutual friends. They realize they live in the same apartment building. Somehow, SOMEWAY they discover that their lives are magically intertwined in a way that keeps them continuously running into each other over and over again, that they've also somehow missed up until this moment. For the next hour or so, we watch their relationship unfold, until the next MAJOR roadblock in the movie occurs.

The betrayal. Someone makes a mistake. They break up. There's heartbreak, tears (from the characters AND the audience) moody music, and probably rain. Then, somehow within the last 10 minutes of the movie the man (or woman) realizes they can't live without the other person. All conflict is reconciled, happy music plays, they kiss, walk off into the sunset, and we live the theater feeling preeeeeeetty good a bout life in general :D

Which is why it makes me laugh. Because relationships don't work that way. But I think the REAL reason it makes me laugh is because we, as girls (and some guys...no shame!) walk out of the theater, and start looking for our "cute meet." And ALL of a sudden everyone from the person taking your order at McDonalds to the boy you trip over in the coffee shop could be your ONE. I'm not dogging that. He could be! God works in mysterious ways, and believe me I've seen it. And I'm DEFINITELY guilty of this too. But it just makes me laugh how when me and my friends walk out of the coffee shop, and she bumps into some cute college boy walking in the door, after they exchange apologies the "AHA" look appears....and she turns and through narrowed eyes asks the question ".....did I just miss him?"

NO. You probably didn't. But goodness, it's funny anyways :D

1 down, 6 to go....

Even though it hasn't sunk in yet, allow me to announce very loudly and very excitedly that I AM DONE WITH MY FRESHMAN YEAR OF COLLEGE. Yup. 3 years from now I'll be walking down the aisle, dreading having to finally grow up a little bit and face the real world. Or graduate school. Either really. But that being said...

How do you sum up a semester of lessons, laughter, tears, pain, roommates, hallmates, South Carolina and GOD in a blog post? It's hard for me to write about, because no matter how many words I use or how grandiose my language becomes, it STILL won't be enough to adequately communicate the overwhelming emotion and living of life that God has walked me through this semester.

I have been reminded time and time again that this earth is not our home, and that no one we meet on earth can fulfill the void that God reserved in our hearts specifically for Himself. I've learned it's hard to grasp concepts like mercy, faith, love (the overwhelming, unconditional, allow me die for you kind), and forgiveness because we human beings are so unbelievably BAD at it. I've learned that any semblance of these qualities in our lives is only because we have a Savior who IS all of these things, and when I am loved and cared for by my closest friends it is when I see Jesus the most.

I've learned that love means patience, selflessness, trust, and putting one foot in front of the other one day at a time. I've learned that love is also not butterflies in the stomach, heart skips a beat, hands get clammy and I can't breath....even though those things are awesome. I've learned the Christian walk is hard, and surrendering to Christ can be painful, even though I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that surrendering all these things is worth it in the face of an all-fulfilling Savior. I've learned I have a long way to go before I'm ready for marriage, parenting and a family, and if God ever chooses to bring those things into His plan for my life it will be in His time and not mine. Even though a lot of the time I prefer my timing to His...until I sit back and realize how much trouble I would get into if God let me run my life even for a week :P

On a less serious note .... I've taken out small parts of the bucket list :D I've been to Savannah multiple times. I've survived the CIU cafeteria, found a life-long best friend in my beautiful roommate, and discovered that I'm actually kind of bad at decorating. I've discovered watching a movie when I should be doing homework does NOT mean that I will somehow magically have an overabundance of time on my hands in which to do the homework later. I have discovered 35 is a magical age, and have already started plans to move into a cat lady home with Stephanie and Melissa ;) I've bought my ticket for Passion 2013 (AHHH!), visited Impact 360, adopted a little sister, missed my puppies, had NO time for reading, completely failed at waffle making, washed my shirt in the sink (then dried it with a hair dryer), chased down a candy nommer, ATTEMPTED to learn how to play Halo (it didn't work), found the best smelling young man in the world, and learned that right about 2 AM my brain shuts down and nothing I say makes sense anymore :D

Oh. And run the Color Run :D And made a gingerbread house. Kind of. And watched the Shining. And scary movie upon scary movie which instantly led to extreme regret for THOSE decisions. And saw my first shooting star! And been read aloud too. And redid my room. And taken NUMEROUS road trips :)

I am thankful for everything God has put in my path this semester...even the lessons that were hard and the doors He chose to shut, and the times He told me "wait" and "I've got this." NOW I'm home for Christmas break with lots of free time and no schoolwork to do. Look out world :D

Thankful

Before you start reading....yes, this is one of those typical Thanksgiving day blog posts. And yes, it is being posted 3 days after Thanksgiving. But my list this year is different, and maybe you won't be able to tell the difference, but I definitely can. See, I've always been able to sit down and list out things that I'm "thankful" for....basically things that I know are good and on some level know I can't control, so I'm "thankful" that God gives them to me. For the first time this year, I'm really beginning to understand just how much I CAN'T understand how undeserving I am of the gifts God has given me...whether that's people, things, places, family, ANYTHING. And it's overwhelming. And I'm going to forget things. But here it goes :)

I'm thankful for my family. I'm thankful for this wonderful body of people that God decided to allow me to be born into, with all of our flaws and problems and all of the good things all mashed into one. I'm thankful for two parents who put up with me and look out for me, even if it comes across as silly. I'm thankful for a little sister who has become not only my sister but one of my best friends. I'm thankful for Mamaw, who spoils me, and Im' thankful for my two brothers who basically make it harder to leave home every time that I have to.

I'm thankful for my friends....but it's not JUST  friends. I'm thankful for my special set of friends who have become less like friends and more like family. I'm thankful for the Gibbs, who live a mere 2 HOURS AND 45 MINUTES away from me, and who let me crash at their house basically ANY time I want to :) I'm thankful for the lovely Rachel Bownds, who is currently traipsing across England doing wonderful things. Andddddd *drumroll*

My Impact class BASICALLY gets their own paragraph. There aren't words to describe how thankful I am for this group of people, and how much they have blessed me just by BEING. God used Impact to change my life, and He did it most often through the people He had walk in and out exactly when He needed them to. I could devote an entire BLOG post to the memories, laughter, tears, stretching, hurt, glory, beauty and LOVE that surrounds the 9 months spent with these people, and it probably still wouldn't cover it all. So suffice to say God took a group of very, very mismatched people, and crammed them together to become a group of people made up of my best friends and non-official family.

AAAAAAAND I'm thankful for the little things :D Basically right now this means I'm thankful for walking outside and smelling bonfire. For leaves that are changing colors. For finding the perfect song that describes your life. For the fact that when people tell you their favorite Taylor Swift song, they're actually telling you a lot about themselves. For technology that lets me communicate with my best friends spread out across the states...and right now across the globe :P For fireplaces and smoke and campfire smells and lit up Christmas trees (fake or not ;) and cold pillows to hug and home cooking and the magical feeling that associates itself with Christmas and this SEASON...that lets me believe that anything is possible, no matter how far fetched it seems :)

Most of all, I'm thankful for my Savior who is faithful. Who puts up with my selfish & ungrateful heart and still loves me. Who continues to bless me daily with new mercies and gifts, regardless of whether I am deserving. And who speaks to my searching heart in ways I NEVER expect, puts people in my life who love me and who let me love them, and who never fails to open doors when I least expect it :)

Life is so good ya'll. Circumstances might be crummy, and things might not be going the way you want, but because of Jesus life is SO. GOOD.

November has arrived!

IT'S NOVEMBER! IT'S FINALLY HERE!

I had a friend once that teased me about getting too excited about the little things of life. Half the time I think he's right, and half the time I think 'meh!' :P But this month is PACKED and I cannot WAIT.

I've realized this month that I have a lot of dreams. Yes, sadly, my bucket list has not gotten any smaller. For the one or two items I've accomplished, I'm pretty sure I've added three or four more. Also, weirdly enough, a LOT of them have to do with the sunrise. Probably cause that's my favorite time of day :D Then there's the list of things I want to do with my little sister come Thanksgiving Break, my ACTUAL bucket list, and the small list of wishes I keep in my desk that the general public doesn't get to see. But let it be known, I HAVE actually started to make a dent in this thing....

NOW. MY MONTH :D

Week 1 held the North/South Football Game :D What what!

That would be the ladies of the South. Who played well, but DID in fact get our butts handed to us by the ladies of the North. Seriously though, it was SO. MUCH. FUN. Plus I got to use the phrase "Hey Bethany, where you headed?" "Oh, just football practice...." and then watch people's faces try to put together WHY this freshman college girl was talking about playing football for her bible college. Also, our shirts not only LOOK like they're highlighter yellow...they actually are, in fact, highlighter yellow. Just a small added bonus to the night. 

Week 2 was the play AND Sydney's birthday AND a family dinner at Mo's with Mom, Dad, Sister, Aunt Michelle and the rest of our hall family that we haven't family tree-ed yet :D The play was You're A Good Man Charlie Brown, and featured 3 of the lovely hallmates as Lucy, Sally and Woodstock :D We may or may not have made a giant sign with copies of their faces on it, and then cheered at random times during the performance. 

AND FINALLY WEEKEND THREE IS HERE! I've only been waiting for this weekend for...eh, 45ish days :D I'M GOING HOME LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! Not HOME home. Impact 360 home :D And with this comes the fact that I am finally going to get to meet the new Impacters, finally going to get some quality face-to-face time with the beautiful Hannah Richards, and best of all, I'm going to get to see my IMPACT FAMILY! Or parts of them anyways :D And just because the excitement doesn't stop there, Saturday and Sunday I'm going to be in Savannah, which right now holds the title of my favorite eastern coast city (it's vying with 2 others for the title, but I haven't been to the other 2 yet...) with my BEST FRIENDS Melissa and Stephanie!!!! 

Then, I'm back at school for one day...ONE day, and I'm on a plane, in the sky and flying home. My flight leaves at 5:30 in the morning on Tuesday, which means I will be one very happy, but VERY sleepy chick. But one VERY short week from now, I will be reunited with my baby sister, my wonderful brothers, and my BEAUTIFUL parents!!! And over the course of ALMOST a week Tricia and I will: 

1. Have Thanksgiving. Seriously. Where is my life going? 
2. Fall photoshoots. 
3. Make a fire. 
4. By the Taylor Swift album! And then transfer that album to Julia and Alicia! 

There's more, but they're just little things and this blog post is getting LONG. I can't believe November is actually here, and we're ALREADY almost halfway through it. College is flying by so much faster than I expected, and I can't believe the relationships the Lord has put me in...and the doors He's opening to new ones ;) 

HAPPY NOVEMBER YA'LL! 

Waiting, waiting, waiting!

Let’s just get this out of the way: I. HATE. WAITING.

There. I said it. I am probably the world’s most impatient person. EVER. It's something only God can truly work on, has been working on, and will probably CONTINUE to work on for the rest of my life here on Earth. I don’t like waiting on growth, waiting on relationships, waiting on exciting roadtrips, waiting on words of direction for the Lord, waiting while He prepares my future….waiting for the CIU wi-fi to load, waiting for TV shows to come out every week, waiting for dinner time when I'm especially hungry, waiting on friends to talk to me, waiting on the light to go green, waiting on….you get the general idea. Big or small, if it involves waiting on something, chances are I don’t like it.

That ESPECIALLY applies to the big things. Liiiiike this whole “waiting on a relationship” big thing.

I’m going to a church right now that is wrapping up a 10 week marriage series. Yes. A MARRIAGE SERIES. “Bethany…you’re talking about waiting…and being single…WHY on EARTH would you choose a church that spent your ENTIRE first semester of freshman year talking about MARRIAGE?”

(I’m also a little (edit: a lot) hyper as I write this. Just to put that out there…)

To be honest, I have no idea why I chose the church that I did. I have no idea why the idea of sitting in on 10 weeks of talking about marriage was appealing to me, or why I decided to wait it out through this really awkward life period I’m in right now. The only meaningful conclusion I can come to is, it WASN’T me. Choosing Midtown was totally, completely, UTTERLY a God thing, and I’m so thankful that He didn’t let me give in to my petty little “but Jesus I’m SINGLE” pity parties.

Now. Back to this whole waiting business.

Adam told a story this morning about the Jewish custom of betrothal…now affectionately known around Midtown as “engagement on steroids”. Essentially, as I understand it, in Jewish culture when a young man was betrothed to a young woman, they were legally bound to one another. To end the betrothal would be the rough equivalent of filing for a divorce. As soon as the betrothal was official, the young man would go away and begin preparing (a.k.a. building) a house and home for his beautiful wife to come live in with him after they got married. But the thing WAS, she had no idea when the house would be done, and so she had no idea when the love of her life would be coming to make the marriage official, and sweep her off to start their new lives together.

My reaction? “Ugh. Waiting. Cute waiting…but waiting.”

But essentially…isn’t that what life is all about? Waiting for something in the future that we have no timetable for? And I’m not really talking about marriage, or relationships, or jobs, or college acceptance or ANYTHING like that. I’m kind of talking about Jesus.

Jesus is the bridegroom of the church…and just like the bridegroom in Jewish culture, he’s gone away to prepare a place for us to live with Him. ETERNALLY. And we, His bride, the church, on earth, have NO idea when He will return to sweep us off for our new lives together. So isn’t life ITSELF, just a huge, momentous bundle of nothing but waiting for JESUS to come back? And we’re not just called to wait and twiddle our fingers, we’re called to use our lives to make more of Him. To know Him, and to make Him known.

So LIFE is nothing but waiting, but I suppose when you put into perspective that we’re waiting on Jesus, all those other little things kind of pale in comparison. Maybe common sense, but waiting is definitely something I've been struggling with lately, and this was definitely some much needed hammering of my perspective back into place. I am nowhere NEAR to being good at this, as much as I would like to say that I am. I'm still super impatient, and I still don't like waking up each day NOT KNOWING if this is the day that my life changes, or I finally get that one phone call, or I finally get that text that says I miss you, or that job that prepares me for my career or....I could go on. But I think essentially, God's pushed me to it and now He's pushing me through it. 

And the very fact that I'm still standing here and not ranting and raving on the phone to my little sister about how FRUSTRATED I am with impatience, is a sure sign that God is sovereign, in control, and able to change even the most stubborn hearts. I.E. MINE :) 

HAPPY NOVEMBER YA'LL!