Tuesday, May 22, 2012

A lil' bit of the past....and a lil' bit of the future...

I have spent a lot of time today pondering my future....all the promises it holds, and all the questions that it raises. 

It makes me laugh that almost exactly a year ago I was sitting in this exact same spot, wondering what college was going to hold, who I was going to meet, and what exactly this whole Impact 360-gap year program- crazy stuff was. Well Impact happened and God open and shut doors accordingly, and now a year later I'm looking head on at the next turn of life and I STILL don't know what to expect! Of course, now that Impact has ended I have a lot more information to draw from. I've experienced God in new ways, and there are hundreds of memories that I hold close and treasure, and pull out when I'm starting to really miss the way things used to be. There are songs that I can no longer hear without picturing the people that sing them during worship, fast food restaurants that are bitter sweet because they just aren't the same without my best friends. 

I know for sure that I'm going to Columbia International University next year in Columbia, South Carolina, and I am beyond excited. The inner bookworm that I sometimes smother is secretly pretty excited to start studying Psychology....and to start and end all required math and science courses :/ I'm unbelievably excited to be living in South Carolina, especially since I'm only going to be about 2 hours away from my best friend & her family who live in Savannah. Not to mention that Savannah is just BEAUTIFUL, and will be lovely to get away to every so often. 

But that's about where the certainty ends. That's the only thing God has shed light on. And at times that's really, REALLY frustrating. Partly because I'm uneasy and tired of waiting, but MOSTLY because I just like having answers. I like knowing what I'm working for. I like  knowing what tomorrow and the next day and the next year brings, because even though I'm spontaneous I really am not a huge fan of nasty surprises. 

So I suppose (okay, I KNOW) that this is where trusting God comes in. And facing one day at a time comes in. And being patient and letting God and time and relationships and future plans and goals grow at their own pace, at God's pace, and not mine! 

Basically all I know is that right now,  it looks like I have an amazing summer to spend with my families and make memories. I have a wonderful school to head to next year. I have incredible friends to stay in touch with. And I have an all-loving, all- knowing, all-powerful God  who holds the rest. The future is looking pretty bright :) 

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