Thursday, March 8, 2012

Vulnerability, Lakes & a Manless Campus ;)

Super recently, I was put in a position where I was extremely vulnerable. I pretty much gave a good friend an unedited, unhindered view into who I am. The basest, most basic form of Bethany. No pretty little frills or curtains to dress up the fears, doubts or insecurities. And also, no pillows or cushions to soften the passions, dreams & love. Extremely new experience. Extreme vulnerability. It was without a doubt, one of the most uncomfortable and nerve wracking experiences that I have ever had happen to me. It was AWFUL. I walked around my room for a good five or ten minutes babbling because I was simply at a loss for what to do with myself! Not a position that I would willingly (knock on wood) want to put myself in again for a VEEEEEEEERY long time.

But it got me thinking.....I don't ever think I've felt like this before! And that made me wonder. How many times have I stood bare and vulnerable before my Savior? Stripped away from all the little strengths and dreams that I'm clinging too, unwilling to give God my WHOLE heart because I'm scared I won't know what to do with myself when I do? I literally don't remember ever feeling so vulnerable before. Which means, probably, I have NEVER turned myself completely and wholly over to God. Now, this is a lil' bit of a harder concept for me to wrap my head around, because God's not physically HERE. And if I'm being honest, I don't even know all the areas of my life I'm hiding from God behind. (Insert self-sufficiency devotion week from Pam HERE :D). So for the next two months, that will be something I'm praying about and something that (hopefully) stays at the fore-front of my mind.

On a slightly lighter, and much funnier note.

The men have departed from campus for the next 2 days so they can go learn to be better men. In the afternoon that they've been gone, the women have basically already had some very legit party times. We went reading down at Callaway....and yes, maybe some of us "happened" to fall in the lake ;)

Yes. We women are pretty awesome. ^They are the definition of awesome, because it is March and that lake was COLD :D But anyhoo. 

Here's to a couple of days where girls get to just be girls, where men get to seek the Lord, and re-union where we get to come back together and lift each other up for the rest of our 2 months together :) 

Impact 360 ladies and gentlemen. 

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